HEEEEEY!
I haven't been on this for soooo long life has just been INSANE! I've recently been talking to a few support groups that have to deal with children with ODD (oppositional defiance disorder) and ADHD. My middle step daughter was diagnosed with both of these disorders. The awesome thing is there's so many ways to handle this without medication. I'm not saying you shouldn't try medication and it can absolutely help but a lot of the medication used to treat these disorders are the same as meth. Because Leigha was born addicted to opiates I know as a parent I wouldn't want her exposed to narcotics again especially now that she's at a higher risk for addiction. So anyway, these support groups are fantastic. These women have children that range from the ages of 15 months to 15 years. It's pretty incredible to have a group of parents who have dealt with it all and are able to give us advice on what has helped in the past. So here's a few suggestions on what could possibly help your child with ODD and or ADHD.
1. A weighted blanket
These are FANTASTIC! Children with ODD and ADHD usually also have the fantastic ANXIETY disorder. Great right? An occupational therapist suggested one for Leigha considering her disorders. These weighted blankets are drug free and focus on input on the deep pressure receptors on your body. These are usually used on the lap or when laying down they cover the top of your body. These blankets give children the sense of security and "Grounding" they're looking for. These are also great for at night, Leigha had trouble sleeping before and it was really tough on her. These weighted blankets when used at night release more seratonin and melatonin into your system making sleep easier and longer.
2. Cutting out artificial colors, sweeteners and preservatives
We did this with Leigha when she was about three years old. We knew she definitely had symptoms of ADD and upon further investigation (since she couldn't be diagnosed until she was in school) we found this little gem. SO we took her off chocolate milk, juice, everything. There was no candy, no red dye, nothing. She went straight to ice water which she ended up absolutely loving. Her body knew it was better for her so that's what she ended up craving! We cut out all the sugar and crap and it kept her calmer and more focused on what she was doing because she didn't have the sugar high making her crazy! Unfortunately in her other household this was not put into affect therefore when she would come home she was absolutely crazy and we had to detox her every other week. But it did prove our point that stuff like that crap was hurting her and getting her away from that stuff did improve a lot of her issues.
3. Going Gluten Free
So my brother has celiac disease so he gets physical signs of issues when he ingests gluten. My sister in law also has this but her issues come out physically, like on her skin. I also have a mild allergen to gluten which also comes out on my skin. It's kind of amazing how gluten effects your system in different ways. Children with ODD and ADHD can benefit greatly from going onto a gluten free diet. We started Leigha on this when she was about three and a half, maybe four. Her lunch was yogurt, peanut butter and jelly on gluten free bread with no crust and a fruit. She LOVED it. It took her a bit to get used to the gluten free bread and we had to try a few different products to get the right mac and cheese (we ended up with annies organic gluten free). Gluten produces a substance called “gluteomorphin” which becomes like an opiate to the brain, causing brain fog, as well as addiction. This is why so many children with behavioral problems crave starchy breads and carbohydrates: the opiate-like effect they get from eating these foods makes them crave more. Leigha was already susceptible because of her birth to things like this, therefore it was an obvious choice to take her off of gluten. Again unfortunately this was not encouraged at her other house and again every two weeks we had to detox her from gluten but I can tell you her pediatrician and her school noticed a difference when she was not on gluten.
4. Show unconditional love and support
This one is kind of obvious but I would usually sit down with Leigha at dinner time and we would talk about her day, her behaviors, what happened. I would ask her why she felt compelled to do certain things, a lot of it had to do with the other household she would visit every other week, she was very confused. But a lot of it was her disorders, she didn't' WANT to misbehave, she just didn't understand why she was misbehaving. This was years before she was formally diagnosed but I knew my kid and I knew she was confused. Every night we would eat dinner, get a bath, read a book, say our prayers and go to bed. She THRIVED on this routine every single day. She had to do it, if something threw the routine off SHE was thrown off. SO i really had to be on a routine with her it was good for all of us.
At the end of the day your child is your child, and as with all of my girls I want nothing more than to see them succeed in life. I've sat down with Becky numerous times whether on facetime or in person and discussed different aspects of OUR parenting. Because myself, Michael, Becky and Corey are all her parents. Just like Ashley's mom and myself and Michael are all of Ashley's parents. We want to see these children succeed in life and be happy, functioning adults. That's what any parent would want. We also want these children in the best possible place to be able to make this happen. Regardless of your feelings, or your lack of feelings, these are our future. These are our children. We need to raise them in environments they won't have to recover from. You need to put your feelings aside and analyze yourself as a parent and ask yourself "Am I doing everything possible for my child to succeed". If that means you need to remove yourself as a parent then so be it, I can promise you'll get more acceptance and respect from the other parents in the picture if that's the choice you make. Because you brought this child into this world, your job is to make their dreams come true. But down the spiteful tendencies and the hate. Make room in your heart for God and let him tell you what the right thing to do is. Because deep down you know what the right thing is, let him into your heart.
As always prayers for all you parents out there! Have a great week!
Kristen
No comments:
Post a Comment