Hey! that's two in one day! Aren't you guys so excited! I got home from work today and really just feeling so exhausted. Mentally, emotionally, religiously. I really just feel like i'm battling with so much right now and the hits just keep on comin' you know? My faith tells me to keep having faith and that there's a plan for everything that happens. It's not my job to know the plan, it's my job to be still and know that He is God. He's blessed me with beautiful step daughters, an insanely handsome husband, a great job and security. I have a beautiful home and i really have a great life. Then something traumatic happens and I can only sit back and think "why is God letting this happen". I recently read another blog post about how we really turn things into God "letting" things happen. Think about that for a minute. God doesn't want bad things to happen to us, he doesn't want kids to be born addicted to heroin, he doesn't want kids starving on the streets or squatting in foreclosed homes. God doesn't want people living in poverty or being murdered in cold blood. That's not Gods will. What this post really makes you realize is that God is in control and how you react to that situation is what Gods will is. You can control every single thing that happens around you for the most part. But when you lose a loved one or something terrible happens, you really have to give it to God. Because letting it manifest and create anger is such a horrible thing to let eat you alive. Me and Michael will be together for three years in a couple of days. We've had our ups, we've had our downs. We've had people blatantly lie about situations regarding us. We'll be married in October for two years and let me tell you it's been a rough two years. But it's taught us to keep our faith and marriage is absolutely forever. I chose him, he chose me. If he wanted someone else he would have gone to someone else, but God gave him to ME. Isn't that an awesome feeling? We were married before God and our family in His house. When bad things happen or were really having a bad day it's so easy to ask why God is allowing this to happen. What if God is teaching us how to react to a situation the right way? What if he's teaching us how to pray and talk to him? There's never been a place I've stood he's not already been. He knows exactly what's going to happen and when. What we do to react or not react to that situation is what he's trying to teach us. Sin is human nature, when it entered the garden of eden it entered the human race. That's who we are, were sinners. Nothing is going to change that, but praying and having faith and believing he is our God is what is important. At the end of a hectic day and heck a hectic week I try to sit down and really just thank him for everything he's given me. I have a pretty awesome life and instead of blaming God for things that have gone wrong and asking him why he hasn't done something it finally hits me that he HAS done something. He made me! I'm the something that's going to make moves to destory this terrible system. I'm the one that's going to blow the top of and uncover decades of corrupt government. He made me, and he made me well. So the things that are about to go down in the next few weeks nobody's going to be prepared for, and it has my name written all over it. Because God made me to be a lion, not to sit around and hope someone else will take care of it. So i'm going to go enjoy dinner with my husband and have a nice movie night and relax. Then start my weekend with my awesome kids and enjoy my family. Because that's what God wants for me.
Have an awesome weekend guys!
Kristen
Morning all!
I read an interesting article the other day about how just because you're not friends with your ex doesn't mean you can't co parent well. Me and Michael co-parent really well with Brianna and Ashley's moms. We are almost always in constant communication, not even always about the kids! We keep in touch about our personal lives as well, any health issues, vacations, whatever. We've even hashtagged #sisterwives! hahaha. the point is just because you're not friends doesn't mean you can't co parent well. Parental alienation is a problem! You can't give someone a few hours a month and think that's going to make a relationship with a child. Doing that is spiteful and shows mental manipulation! The only thing that you're hurting is the child. I'm not saying you have to be best friends with that parent (were just lucky enough to have that) but you do need to make sure you're not bad mouthing someone that child LOVES. Were all guilty of it, things get hostile and things slip out of our mouths. Were humans, we make mistakes. But to blatantly tell a child something is literally only hurting that child. We see it all too often nowadays. The definition of a sociopath is "a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience." I'm sure all of us can think of someone immediately! I know I can. I've known people who have admitted to smacking their child in the face because they talk about the other parent during their visitation! Can you even believe that? I've known people who will literally go out of their way to harm a child just out of spite because they don't like the other parent. Or even better, they don't like who the other parent is dating! A girl flipped out one time when me and Michael got engaged. She sent this distraught text saying "Do you even know how It made me feel when I saw that ring?" Trust me, I have the screen shot! Sociopaths will walk up and down the street outside of someone's job just to try and be on someone's mind. Stalker? Maybe? Their personalities can switch in an instant and they feel no remorse for what they did. Better yet, they will turn around and LIE about what actually happened. If presented with PROOF of something legitimate they will continue to lie. For example if presented with legal documents stating a home is in foreclosure, they will lie and say the bank must be lying because they paid off that home. They literally think what they say is the truth! Co-Parenting with a sociopath can be almost impossible so it's a real shame for the non custodial parent. Keep this in mind if you're in this situation and really just try to do what's best for the child. Because that's what were all here for, to raise these children. And always remember whatever the child might be saying is always the influence of the sociopathic parent. Sometimes walking away and just ignoring is a much better idea than engaging that parent. Visit with the child and spend time with that child and do not engage that other parent. I just hope one day we can all be on that page and people can work towards what's best for the child! Anyway, Thank you for listening and everyone have a safe weekend!
Kristen
Happy Thursday!
I wanted to give a quick update that litigation with Leigha is over. It's no longer a closed court case therefore it's all public information now. I don't want to touch on this subject too much as it's the basis for my book and God has given us a pretty awesome blessing yesterday. It was a phone call we'd been waiting for, for a very long time and after a year and a half we finally see why God asked us to wait. It was something we weren't really expecting but it's something that we'd been asking for prayerfully. This is good news! All will come out in due time and justice will be served. That's all we ask for! Meanwhile we have some work to do and that's okay. In other news this weekend should be beautiful! So excited to get Ashley outside and hiking, playing on the playground, enjoying her sandbox! Life now is so much better and a big sigh of relief can come now. Me and Michael are excited to celebrate our 3 year dating anniversary in 12 days! I can't believe it's been three years, time flies! Were slowly healing from this traumatic situation we've been through but we have awesome family and friends. Also throw some prayers out there for Ashley's mom who's having a procedure today! We talked yesterday and I let her know were thinking about her :) Procedures are always a little scary no matter how big or small so knowing someone is there for you is always nice. We support both of the girls mothers completely and wouldn't want anything but the best for them. Also sending out some prayers for Briannas mom who's struggling with some health issues, we love you and hope you feel better soon! So today is just a quick update on some things, the book is going well. Started to get some call backs from publishers interested in publishing that, so that's awesome! We really want our story to be told from the beginning and allow parents to realize you do have rights and you're not the only one going through this horrible situation. God has blessed us tremendously to be able to communicate with others going through similar situations. So that's pretty much all for now I think I answered all of your email questions, if you want more information or have a concern just shoot me an email and I'm pretty good about responding quickly :) have a great day guys!
Kristen
Hey there!
So I'm in NJ and the weather here makes me want to scream. One day I'm in shorts, the next day I'm in a sweater and pants. What the heck? Choose what you want to do here Mother Nature. This kind of an early post but I did get some emails last night with some questions about some rumors regarding my job. A while ago someone thought they'd come to my job and "talk to the higher ups" and got me fired! LMAO! That obviously ins true because not inky did I not get fired I actually got a promotion. I feel like this type of lying behavior is pretty tyipicak and literally said just to create drama. There were so many emails I just wanted to clear that up this morning instead of emailing everyone back individually and just letting everyone know the truth about things. NOW moving on :) I'm getting acclimated to my new job which is a really good challenge, it was a good move for me and especially finding a job in an area where I really want to be. This was a good career move and somewhere I'd want to stay, marketing is my thing. I do marketing for my brothers company so this was just an obvious decision to make. I'm still torn with where to do these family pictures in June, so anyone with any suggestions let me know! Otherwise i'll just settle with Smithville park which is fine, it's pretty and the kids will like it. Me and the girls all have similar blue dresses and Mikes going to be in a nice blue button up, super cute right!? We didn't do pictures last year so were definitely due, the girls have their pictures up from 2015 when we got married. The Easter bunny came to the house for the girls and they LOVED their baskets, theirs didn't get sent home either LMAO, we keep the baskets for next year duh! They seemed to be really excited, it was nice spending the holiday with them. Me and Ashleys mom have really jumped some hurdles and we communicate all the time now, it's nice being able to have a non hostile relationship. Exchanges are so nice to not have that pit in your stomach because the other party might just start screaming and yelling for no apparent reason. most of the time the girls moms are more likely to talk to me because I know what's going on in my house lol. We discuss the kids, what's going on with them, me and Ashley's mom just discussed what to do with her hair. Little things like that make life easier, Ashley was able to give her mom a picture of her with the Easter bunny and that made her entire day. Both girls don't have to live two lives because someone else is being spiteful. That's exactly how it should be, our lives are meshed with these kids and it's not fair to the kids to make them live two lives. Where they can't talk about what goes on in the house during the week, or school, or their teeth falling out or anything. It doesn't have to be a secret! Ashley's mom literally texts us every single time she has a doctors appointment, or something medically happened. Same with Brianna, especially with her education. Everyone is in the same loop, not keeping secrets. I'm still a step mom and still figuring things out but making that extra effort with each other really helps the kids just be HAPPY. and isnt' that what it's all about? the kids? So this step mom has made it to hump day and super ready for this gorgeous weekend! Keep your emails coming about vacations and spots to take pictures! have an awesome day guys!
Kristen
Good morning again!
Now that life isn't so crazy I can finally get back to my wonderful life as a step mom! Fortunately most of my time is taken up by writing my new book and my new job! I'm still at the same hospital but I've been promoted to marketing rep! So excited for this promotion and this new time in my life. Things have seemed to settle down a bit and now that were getting into the summer I can start planning family vacays with the kids! This year we really want to get back to cape may zoo which was a blast last year. Were also looking to stay at ocean city for a little while to hang out on the beach and explore the board walk. Were also planning family pictures in June so if anyone has any good ideas of places to go let me know! We did our engagement pictures at Smithville park which was really pretty but I'd like some ideas for other places too! I'm always looking for little getaways for us and the kids to do during the summer, day trips and such. Were also going to StoryBook land at some point this summer which is SUPER exciting. I'm so glad we have the ability to take the kids on these family adventures and really give them these experiences when they're little. It's so important for kids to be a part of these things with their entire family and really remember growing up. They get to hang out with their entire family and really feel the love and not have to live with someone who just has so much hate in their heart. As the kids get older it's amazing to watch their little minds work. Ashley's really starting to explore things and it's crazy to think she's almost three and a half and growing like a weed! Briannas going to be 12 this year and the tween stage is upon us! We were actually at Bahama breeze last Friday having dinner and we decided to walk around the mall, I needed to pick up a dress from Abercrombie and fitch. As were walking we see the other half of our family also! Here comes Becky, Corey and Brianna! Funny running into them there, they had also just been at bahama breeze! So we sat and chatted for a while and discussed when I'd pick Brianna up the next day. It's funny because when mike goes to pick up Ashley I go pick up Brianna, with no issues! Imagine that :) I've gotten to a point where I have two beautiful children to care for and everyone can save the drama for their mama. I have no time for that anymore, I have time to be with my family and love what I have. We can plan for our future child now and continue to feel blessed with our children. With all the drama, and the anger, and the immaturity I just realized I have zero time for that. I work full time unlike some people, I have bills to pay unlike some people, I have no time to worry about what other people are doing. As a step mom it's really hard to just swallow your pride and realize some people just aren't worth your time and energy. Easier said than done right? Especially when people are literally on social media threatening your life. Is anyone aware the police can make an issue of this for you? Threatening someone is quite illegal so the police can handle that one for me. Reports with evidence are easy to make and I can tell all of you guys right now I'm not scared of anyone. Especially some facebook gangster who can't even say something to someones face. Please, grow up and sit down because you're not scary and you're not going to do anything to anyone. So be quiet. So now it's back to the daily grind and answering all of your emails! Let me know of any suggestions for vacations or day trips! Thanks guys and have a great day!
Kristen
PS to all the people who just absolutely hate me but insist on stalking everything I do, every time you or one of your "gangsters" clicks on my blog page I get paid :) thanks!
Hey friends!
It's been a little while and I feel like I've been trying to catch up with life lately! The biggest update I have is I'm writing a book! I have my manuscript down and I've sent out some query letters. I've gotten some good feed back on it and it looks like If I play my cards right I could be published this year! This book is a spin off of my blog posts on here and really gives you some true details of the life as THIS step mother and the craziness I've been dealing with the past year and a half. I appreciate all of your prayers and thoughts during this week and all I can say Is god has a plan but for right now I have two beautiful daughters that need my love and attention. Life moves on and theirs won't stop just because I'm grieving. They need me and my job is to help raise them and not create chaos in their little worlds. We spent some time at my mother in laws new house which is GORGEOUS! so excited for their move and the new life they've started. It was really nice having us all together just hanging out again, we need to make more time for that! Mike got to see Leigha this past Saturday and some days are better than others. There's a lot that happens that really kind of opens your eyes to what kind of world she's really living in. Her uncle was arrested last Monday in front of her house so that was probably an interesting thing to see. Leigha watched her mom get arrested years ago and now she gets to watch her uncle get arrested. Must just be like a family reunion! Meanwhile were taking the girls to gymnastics and having family DINNERS. But I guess to each his own right? Were getting super excited for our upcoming vacation time to get off of work, out of the country and really just chill out and de stress from all the nonsense. It's really kind of occurred to me that I'm probably not the only woman that has to deal with someone else wanting her husband. Although it does freak me out sometimes to think of how mentally unstable someone is to really think they're going to get their ex back! move on, do your own thing, covet your own life, not mine. It's really unsettling to think someone is literally copying every single thing you do to try and live your life. Look, I'm a marketing rep for a great hospital, I'm pretty, I'm smart, I'd want to be me too. BUT that's not an option, everyone should be themselves! I'm living my life and loving my kids. I've created wonderful relationships with two women for these girls and that's what matters the most. THEY will have a normal life not knowing hate, and spite and being used to make someone else feel bad. that's insane! So for all you step parents out there look out for my book in the coming months! It's gonna be great I promise! you all have a great day and keep sending me pictures of your awesome adventures!
Kristen
