So recently (Oh I don't know, the past year of my life) it's really hit me pretty hard what a step mom really does in life. A step mom chose to love kids that weren't hers, on top of kids she'll give birth to. Here's a little background on me :)
In 2014 I met my husband Michael. We dated for a while and then we moved in together in August of 2014. We got our first apartment together and my beautiful step daughter Leigha moved in with us (obviously). Now this is the SMARTEST little girl I've ever met my entire life. Right before we moved in I potty trained her which she did instantly. She never had a problem with it! I was so lucky to be able to raise this little girl. When she realized she got her own room, her own toys and her own Ariel mermaid bed she was so excited! I got to decorate her room, pick out her clothes, choose her school, everything! It was the best time of my life to hang out with this little girl. Unfortunately Leigha didn't always have an easy life. Leigha was born in 2011 addicted to heroin :( She spent three weeks in the NICU. Her mother had a long drug and criminal history and continued this while pregnant with this beautiful little girl. Unfortunately at this time the state didn't have any restriction on drug addicted babies and she got to return home with her mother. Shortly after this Leighas mother was arrested and her father was granted full custody, YAY! She spent the next few years learning from her father and bonding. It was incredible to watch! With this upbringing eventhough she was born with ten fingers and ten toes, Leigha had some neurological misfires. During the heroin use everytime her mother used a massive amount of dopamine was distributed through her body in utero. Now at 2 and a half when I met her she couldn't cope with much. If anything set her off instead of a regular temper tantrum Leigha went to self harming. She would smack, choke, punch herself and rip her hair out. Until recently we couldn't comprehend how this didn't hurt her, flash back to my dopamine comment. Because of the massive amount of dopamine distributed through her body because of the heroin addiction her body continues to do this ,therefore Leigha really DOESN'T feel the pain. Amazing isn't it? So flash forward a year and Leighas mom is back in her life. I won't go into details because I really don't want this blog to bash on another human being, but I will say her behavior declined. Over the next few months Leigha got scary angry until eventually one very very sad day in September monsters from the Division of Child Protection and Permanency came into my home and legally kidnapped my step daughter. On top of doing this she was shuffled in and out of multiple foster homes and eventually placed with her mother. The only information I can distribute here is that she has multiple bed bug bites and is now violent towards other people :(
This is a very small portion of my life in the past year as a step mother and let me tell you, IT'S HARD. This is going to be a continuous blog where step mothers can come together and vent, or scream or yell or tell me how your awesome step daughter made honor roll! I don't know many step moms but the ones I do are a powerhouse of friendship for me. Let me know what you're going through and we'll talk, or laugh and cry. I'll also be posting random updates about my three step daughters and how they're doing. Brianna is 10, Leigha is 4 and Ashley is 2! Tell me about yours! and keep checking back for all kinds of fun kids activities I find!
Have a fantastic day ladies!
Kristen
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