Hey it's Friday!!! It's been a crazy week for me this week. I spent the day in Atlantic City on Wednesday for work. We were invited to the Police and Security Expo. I went down there to help with our screenings and marketing our Captain Buscio Program. I had every intention of staying down there and grabbing some great beach pictures but I was exhausted! The police lights and sirens gave me such a migraine I ended up packing up and just heading home. Now that were almost into July I've taken some time to think about upcoming events with the kids and our family. I'm thinking on Saturday were going to head out to Medford for their fireworks. I may or may not have my niece and nephew with me but I'm excited either way to get some great pictures! Tuesday is Fourth of July and my in laws are having a fun barbecue. I'll again be taking some pictures and get some practicing in :) I've recently just given myself to God completely and let him just tell me what to do with myself. It's so hard when you feel like you have five million things going on and you still want to be yourself. Between the hate from other people, the nonsense with the kids and the craziness of life you get so caught up in just trying to make it through everyday alive! Photography is a recent hobby of mine and I'm still working on a lot of things. My wonderful husband and cat put up with all of my nonsense and Mike will go anywhere with me and let me just take five million pictures of him LOL! Pita will sit still for the most part and my dad let me borrow his nice camera for practicing. Hopefully I can afford one of my own later on down the road but for now this is perfect. God's given me that idea and that talent to go out and just photograph everything. He teaches me everyday and gives me the tools to learn something that's going to give me joy. Isn't that awesome? He's led me to instagram and opening my own Etsy shop. Who knows where this will go you know? But for now I'm happy documenting life and nature and enjoying life every single day. I really am just grateful to have the kids and the experiences were able to have. The past 24 hours I've really just sat and given such appreciation to God and what he's allowed me to have. I have this awesome place to live with enough space for us and the kids. We have multiple bathrooms and we paid off our washer and dryer! It's the little things in life but it really does make such a difference. He's given us two working vehicles to get to and from our jobs. I really enjoy what I do for a living and enjoy going to work everyday. I'm able to put food on the table and good clothes on my kids backs. We can do all kinds of activities with them and enjoy the summer and the weather. At the end of the day we get to go home and take showers and lay in our wonderful beds and have a really good nights sleep. I would hate for the kids to have any worries, I never had to worry about anything when I was a kid. That's how it should be! I'm really just loving and appreciating life right now and what I've been given. Tonight I get to pick up my oldest child and hang out with her for the weekend. Tomorrow I get to pick up my youngest child and everyone gets to go see fireworks! I can't wait to get these pictures and hang out all weekend with family and friends. I hope you guys get to do the same, now it's time to go finish my Friday and get my weekend on! Everyone have a GREAT weekend and check out my Etsy and Instagram pages! Links on the bottom ;)
Kristen
https://www.etsy.com/shop/KPhillyPhotography
Do you ever sit down by yourself in a quiet house and just think "how the hell did I get here?". If you told me five years ago I'd be married to a man and have three step daughters I would have laughed right in your face! Before I met Michael I was 25, super awesome, went out all the time, did whatever I wanted to do. I didn't want a man, I didn't want the drama, I didn't want any nonsense other than the crap I brought on myself. And then that fateful date in April he looked up and smiled at me. and i was done for! Dang! I sat on my couch last night in my Victorias secret sleep shirt, eating my salad (which I'm sick of) and just thought about how different life may have been if I had chosen different. And how different a Step mom is VS a Step dad. A man comes into a womans life and all of a sudden he's the hero! He's saved her from loneliness and being a single mom. Well, what the hell about the women!? Step moms are infamous for catching crap, it kills me. I fully appreciate Corey taking care of Brianna. He loves her, he cares for her, he pays for her insurance! And as a fellow step parent I know what it's like to raise a kid full time that doesn't belong to you. It takes a special kind of person to do that. Step moms catch all this slack and nonsense just because they own a vagina. They step into this role and unbeknownst to them it's actually a lions den about to get set on fire. I have decent relationships with my girls moms but in the real world you're only supposed to run ONE household and in MY world I have to work around THREE. How did this even happen?! How on earth did I get in a place like this? I LOVE my kids, love love love. But I envy the women who don't have to schedule pick ups and drop offs and if someones running late then plans get changed. Sometimes on Saturdays I just want to go to my kick boxing class and come home and eat a burnt bagel with cream cheese. But instead I'm running to gymnastics or an event that we had planned. It's funny because if you talk to any step parent, this isn't what they envisioned for their life at all. I do thank God for the relationship with Becky pretty regularly because if I didn't have at least that solid relationship I would lose my mind. I can literally text her at any given time and say "can I pick our kid up and hang out with her?" and she would say "absolutely. c ya later" and that would be it! THANK THE GOOD GOD ABOVE. I need some solidarity in my life LMAO! Step dads have it a bit easier, they just come in with their finances and cool tools and hang out with the kids! I'm not in a situation quite like that since Mike is the bio dad but dads are meant to be awesome. Stepping into a step mom position I quickly realized that 1. Some women didn't want Michael to move on and 2. As much experience as I had with children and as much education did not prepare me for manipulation from other people. My mind is still blown! BUT while I was eating my grass salad and contemplating my future I looked around my house at all my pictures of my kids. All the memories we had in our photo albums, I wouldn't trade that for the world. Because even if it's for a short amount of time, I've given those kids some sort of stability. I'm not going anywhere and in Ashley's case, this is all she's ever known. It's always been Kristen and Daddy, from the beginning. I wouldn't trade it for the world, now I just kickbox every other weekend and on Mondays when I'm feeling extra sassy. The joy the kids have when we have beach days, or the zoo or anything else makes it so worth it. All the pictures on our walls and their little sleeping bodies after a long day at the beach makes my heart full of joy. I may not have dreamed of being a step mom but this is the role I chose. This is my choice and I'm just going to continue to do my best because that's what the kids will always remember. So go sit down in your jammies tonight and eat your burnt bagel with cream cheese and just remember how much those kids count on you and love you. It's worth it, I promise :)
Kristen
I'm not super sure how Monday got here so fast but when Michael woke me up at 5:30 this morning informing me of the time I can tell you I was angry lol I had just found a comfy spot, I was having a super weird dream, and for some reason I thought it was Sunday. SO. Here we are Monday, we meet again. This past weekend was such a chill weekend it was awesome. Saturday we had that super random storm in the morning which didn't really affect us where we live but at my hospital in Browns Mills, they had a microburst! Tore through part of the town, roads were shut down, it was terrible. Thank God everyone was okay and the road to the hospital was open. So Saturday we pick up Ashley and we all get ready to head down to Island Beach State Park in Seaside! Normally we do our beach days at LBI but something was calling me to this beach!
So we got in our bathing "Soups" as Ashley calls them and picked up uncle matt and off we went! We packed our lunches and snacks and a whole bunch of water to eat on the beach. We had beach blankets, umbrellas, and beach chairs. We had an enormous amount of sunscreen because unlike my husband and children I do not tan I just BURN! sooo we get down to the beach, cutest area ever. It's fantastic when we only paid $10 for the car! Ashley immediately wanted to go in the water which was FREEZING. So we spent the entire day in and out of the water, building sand castles and really just enjoying life. My parents ended up coming as well which was fun we got to have everyone there. I got some great pictures that I posted on my Instagram photography page kphilly_photography.
It's my business page so feel free to go look at some awesome memories we caught! We spent HOURS there and then around 3pm we started packing up. This place was great because they had showers so I threw Ashley in one of those to get all the sand off of her before I put her clothes back on. So we all got changed and went off to dinner! We ended up going to Margaritas in Toms River. My friend Kim goes there all the time with her husband John so we decided to stop there. Ashley literally slept through the entire dinner LMAO. I ended up getting a taco salad with pork and it was AWESOME. They also had some pretty amazing chips and salsa and guacamole. After dinner, it was time to go home and just recover from our day in the sun. Upon arriving home I realized just how burnt I was :( Mike, the love of my life that he is, went to CVS and got me Aloe and rubbed it on my back for some relief. I obviously didn't sleep at all last night with my pain level. Ashley eventually woke up and ate her dinner and then we all passed out! It was so awesome and thinking back on our awesome beach day it really hit me that I'm always the photographer! That's who I am, I have such a love for photography that it's an automatic thing. Trust me I got some GREAT shots but it got me thinking about how many moms do this. You're always behind the camera and eventually one day when you're gone, pictures are all your kids are going to have of you.
You need to take more! I try to get someone else to take pictures of me and the kids now so when I'm gone our kids will have these awesome pictures albums that I've created. Your kids won't care how fat you are or if your makeup and hair were done. They'll just care that there are pictures of you all to remember you by. So put down the camera and get in the pictures! It's going to be really important one day so take the time out now to be a part of that. Your kids and family will enjoy it one day! Now it's time for me to prepare for my week, I'll be in Atlantic City Wednesday for work and next weekend is fourth of July weekend! We'll be at my in-laws for a barbecue with my family also. Can't wait to grab some great shots of the kids and family! Everyone enjoy your week and be safe!
Kristen
Happy Friday!!! We made it :) It's been quiet the past few days, so busy! Not much going on in this crazy step mamas life so far. It's kind of nice! smallish update that the summer is crazy but were definitely taking the girls out EVERYWHERE this summer. We were supposed to go to the beach on Saturday but it looks like storms! So I'm going to stop by the Pemberton library after work and grab a museum pass for the Discovery Museum (Please Touch Museum) for us to go to Saturday while it's bummy weather. We've never been but I've heard such good stories! I'm pretty excited to go and really explore everything, Ashley's at an awesome age where everything is still so new to her. Every discovery is a learning experience and it's awesome to watch her grow and discover things. Were going to go down to LBI on Sunday for our beach day since it's supposed to be better that day. Were all prepped with our "bathing soups" as Ashley calls them! Our beach chairs and towels and sand toys! The following weekend is fourth of July weekend so we'll be heading out to my in laws for a barbecue and hopefully some fireworks! Any good fireworks in the area let us know! I'm sure they'll mostly be on the weekend but that's okay too! We love going to fireworks with the kids, they're so exhausted after but they LOVE them. Ashleys never been scared! It's kind of a blessing to be involved so fully in the lives of these kids. We've been transitioning churches for a while now because of our move last year. I've definitely felt an attack on my faith and my family but it's so much easier to ask for help from God and keep it moving you know? There's nothing I can do to change any of the circumstances at hand so why try? Worry and frustration do absolutely nothing but take away from the day at hand. All those sleepless nights, all those worries about situations we can't control, that's not my job to control anything. It's HIS job to control it, I can only control my reaction to things. And how I've previously reacted isn't who I am and that's something that desperately needs to change. This world is a really hard place to be, were human and we sin every single day. It's hard to watch these trials and tribulations and not feel angry with God you know? How can my heartbreak be a part of any kind of plan? But it is, and I've accepted that because that's what it is! I'm not going to change any plan that's already in motion, I just pray for the safety of my girls :) I've really felt a void in my heart since we haven't found a church yet. We need a new home where we can congregate with other christians and be somewhere to testify. It's okay for me to listen to the word everyday on my ipad at work but it's another to feel that love and dedication in a building with other christians. It's such a freeing thought to know we can walk away from situations that don't support our faith. Just leave it where it is and walk away. Is it worth the anger and hostility? It's not. And us as christians and really just as humans are so stuck on this reactions. Every action has a reaction, and though you can't control someone elses actions you CAN control YOUR reaction. Think about that today while you're at work or home with your kids, will this situation matter in five years? Probably not, but your reaction could cause a chain of events. That's why I try to reach out to the girls moms as much as possible and show them that I want us to be family and get along and not have hostility between us. That says so much when you do something nice for someone, people are appreciative when you reach out when you didn't have to. Even if it's paying it forward to someone at the grocery store (Becky, totally called you out!) which probably didn't consume much energy from you but to that person who's card was declined you just fed their family. Help those in need. How often are you at work or the grocery store or standing in line at walmart and have these meaningless conversations about the weather? Did you ever think what's happening in their life? What are they going through right now? Maybe they need a hug, or a prayer or really someone to just ask how they're doing. Think about that during your day when you're out and about, or at lunch with a co worker. Ask someone how they are. Find out about their life and what they're going through, ask if you can pray for them. I have a prayer book that I just continuously write prayers for everyone in. It keeps my mind fresh with who's going through something in their life. Let that sit on your mind today and go help the world! Everyone enjoy their weekend and I'll see you Monday!
Kristen
Can we just talk about the weather real quick? I'm here in New Jersey and it's making me want to stay home from work in the air conditioning and my underwear. It's ridiculous, I hate humidity. This morning I get all ready for work and come in to go over to the hospital to do some work. I walk around there for a while working up a sweat and THEN realize my cute new shoes are tearing up my foot! So I had to walk back to my office basically limping from this wound and point ointment and a bandaid on it. Then I have to text my mom who works in surgery here to bring me different shoes because these are from hell and I can't wear them lmao. So last night I sent Becky a rough draft of my book for her to go over. That's the first time someone that was more of a third party has read it, she told me this morning it had her in tears. I guess because I'm writing it and I've lived through that emotion already it doesn't affect me as much. Someone reading it for the first time it affects differently. All the names are being changed for privacy reasons except for mine and Michaels but the vast amount of details and emotions in this book are pretty incredible. Everyone knows the situation but doesn't know the details of everything that happened. It was nice to have a third party read it and give me their input on it before publishing. Anyway so now in the midst of my falling apart and wound having I have four hundred things to do lol I haven't finished my coffee yet and I definitely need that, I have eight more pounds to lose and I'm getting really sick of healthy food. I've been eating for nutritional purposes for so long that me and Becky made a taco date when I reach my goal lmao! I really just need to shed this last couple pounds and go on a date with my sister wife because i'm totally over this and I just want to go back to normal lol I'm not sure what I'm going to do after I reach my goal, this has been almost a year that I've been working towards something. Now I can finally start to refocus on my book and get that finished so we can start the publishing process. Work is good as usual just waiting for the weekend so we can go to the beach Saturday! I need a good beach day! Just the sun and the waves and relaxing because I need to clear my mind for sure. We have the beach this weekend and in July were pretty packed with the kids hopefully going to Ocean City and the Cape May Zoo and we have our family pictures that were rescheduled on July 8th. July is going to be a busy month! This morning in the car I heard this song on the christian radio station I listen to #KLOVE and it's this whole song about how grace wins every time. It really got me to thinking about how God's grace really is an incredible thing. There's some crappy people out there and we all sin. Regardless of what your sin is it's all the same. We do it everyday whether we realize it or not. But now at 28 years old and thinking about what I've been through, Grace really is something we need to just think about. Is it worth the drama? nope. It's not. So guys, keep it moving. Don't respond to negativity whether it's coming from friends, work or even someone at church. Grace wins, so walk away from the negativity and drama. Do what you feel is right, for you'll be judged anyway. So keep doing great things with your kids, don't take into consideration opinions of anyone but God and your family. Love those kids, love your husband, love God and love YOURSELF. Because when you go to bed at night that's what counts. Think about God's grace today and how much he loves you, I'll bet you anything it makes you change your day a little bit ;) Happy Tuesday!
Kristen
Happy Monday! haha I'm sure you're all just SO excited to start this week! I know a lot of kids are getting out of school for the summer so let it begin! We had a great Fathers Day weekend with all of the dads in our lives. I picked up Brianna Friday like usual and ordered pizza for us. Then we went to Amico Island park in Delran. We have a weird obsession with all of our local parks so we dragged Brianna into it lmao! We went and wandered around, it was a little too "woodsy" for me but the animal life was incredible. We saw SO MANY DEER it was insane, Brianna and Mike loved taking pictures. We did a nice little hike around the Island and then went to our local FROYO place for dessert :) Mike and Brianna obviously just got a buttload of sugar on theirs and I stuck to my sorbet with fruit (so exciting) BUT this next ten pounds won't come off by itself! Then we went home to relax which was just nice to chill out for a bit. I didn't have anything really planned this weekend because I was babysitting Saturday night and it was rainy and I just didn't care that much lol we picked up Ashley and hung around the house most of the morning. We did run out to a vet in Marlton which then triggered Ashley into continuously asking for a puppy. No thanks kid, I have two kids and a husband I can't handle another animal lol we already have pita! Anyway so I left to go babysit and trusted Mike with the kids hahahaha. Well he kept them alive and that's all I can ask for! I got home a little late Saturday night so Sunday morning was ROUGH. I got up and went to shoprite for breakfast casserole ingredients since that's Mike's favorite. While I was there I also picked up a card and thing of cupcakes for Corey and Hank (the girls step dads). I know with Mothers Day I always get a text and stuff from the other moms and I wanted to let Corey and Hank know they're appreciated! Ashley was really excited to give it to Hank and it was nice to show some appreciation to them also. I like that were one big family and we can do things like call each other at random times, acknowledge different holidays together and stuff. Tammy ended up calling me saturday about thunderstorms coming in and I skyped with Becky and Corey a little later that day. I like the open communication, it's more of a friendship rather than a co parenting relationship. We all co parent really well together but it's nice to have that friendship attached. Nobody has to deal with the drama of nonsense, just keep living and raising the kids. Everybody's happy happy happy! Especially our girls! So Sunday we made breakfast for Mike and gave him his fathers day presents. We got him a frame that says "daddys girls" on it with a picture of him, ashley and brianna. And he also got a shirt that says "Worlds greatest Farter, I mean father" which he obviously LOVED and wore the entire day lmao. Then it was naptime and when we all got up we went to my moms house for dinner. We had steak and salmon. I'd never given Ashley salmon before and she was all about that fish. Ate a whole piece by herself! We also gave my dad the FitBit HR 2 for Fathers Day so now we can track his nonsense lmao! I got some good pictures of Mike and the girls and all around it was a great Fathers Day weekend for him. I love how much time he gets to spend with Brianna and Ashley. We ended up just walking around our neighborhood last night because we were so exhausted! I hit 169 pounds this morning so 9 more to go by the middle of July! This step mama is now exhausted and ready to get on with her week! We'll be going to the beach next weekend and gearing up for July! Let me know where you guys go for fireworks so we can figure out the best place to go :) You all have a GREAT Monday and stay dry!
Kristen
Friday! heeeeeey! I LOVE Fridays :) It's the last day of the work week, I get to pick up Brianna after work and hang with her for a while. Our weekend is coming up! I get to babysit Saturday but Fathers day is Sunday! Which means we get to pamper Mike all day :) I was just looking at some articles about Americans and obesity. My hospital is actually going to start doing community outreach events to battle childhood obesity. That's what a lot of my meetings have been about lately. So delving into some research there's some startling statistics! An estimated 160 million Americans are either obese or overweight. Now if you look at what the government is stating what is a healthy weight it can get a little ridiculous, especially with BMI. For instance I weight 171 pounds and at 5'7 my BMI is 26.8 and that's technically overweight. I can agree with that because I have about 11 pounds to go before I hit my second goal weight. The amount of children specifically obese in America is a little startling. When I was a kid if we had fast food we had chicken nuggets, fries and a soda. That was in the early 90's and now we have so many more options. Unfortunately with the poverty rate rising and access to healthy options not rising it's hurt America pretty significantly. I switched over my husband and kids to healthy eating in 2014 when I started my weight loss journey. We cut out sugar completely, we switched to all organic meats, fruits and veggies and really watched our processed food intake. We really still do that three years later. I cut out red meat for the most part of my families diet and I rarely ever eat red meat. We eat a lot of turkey and chicken for protein or fish. When I order my groceries (because I hate actually going grocery shopping) I'm really particular with what me and the kids eat. Ashley specifically always always always asks for ice water. I've offered her watered down orange juice and she always wants water. Her body knows water makes her feel better so she automatically asks for it. She goes through yogurt like a monster, she doesn't eat sugary cereals or anything. We did go to a FROYO place the other day and I let her pile her frozen yogurt up with crap sugar but that's so rare and we brushed our teeth pretty severely when we got home lmao! Cavities are not something we ever want to deal with. They're terrible. I've never had a cavity and I'm not about to get one now! SO when I do get my groceries I end up paying a significant more amount than if I had just chosen processed foods and pasta! You can get a box of pasta and a can of pasta sauce for under $1.50. So ultimately if you ate that everyday for a week you'd spend $10.50 for an entire week of dinners. I spend about $100 or so a week on healthy foods. We do a lot of smoothies also so that's fruit, spinach, greek yogurt and a protein powder. That's expensive! I was driving the other day and saw a sign that a fast food restaurant has any size soft drink for $1! You know what water costs? $3. That's absolutely mind blowing. Sugar is 800 times more addicting than cocaine, so once it gets in your system it's hard to flush it out. Your body constantly craves it. Call me what you want but I'd rather my kids be healthy and active than sit them in front of a tv or electronic eating crap all day. Americas obesity rate in children it's getting completely out of control and we need to educate our citizens. We also need to drop our prices for organic, non processed foods. Were the only country that does this! Our kids are so easily placed in front of the TV now it's ridiculous, GO OUTSIDE! I'm constantly doing something with the girls on the weekends to get away from snacking and being lazy. We as parents need to make a choice for our childrens health, don't let obesity take over your child and then they can't take care of it later on in life. Look for outreach activities in your community to learn about obesity and how to battle it :) I'm sure you'll see us out there shortly! I hope everyone has a great weekend and I'll see you all Monday!
Kristen
